Well I wake up this morning I rolled out of bed I felt like a dog who’s been kicked in the head Checked out my mail there was letter that read, it said Love for sale, love for sale I picked up the phone, everyone I could I let my fingers do the walking through the telephone book You cant catch a fish if you ain’t got the hook Love for sale, love for sale Well, send up the signal and throw me a line Somebody explain «This funny valentine» It might not be legal but it sure ain’t a crime Well I’m one step from crazy and two steps behind I called it, Colombo from my TV set I’ve tried the dating game I haven’t found her yet I’m hoping that she’s looking like a Penthouse pet Love for sale, love for sale Well, we’ve been living together 3 years 2 hours, 20 minutes maybe four hundred beers She seems, you cant shop for love when you’re shopping at Sears Love for sale, love for sale I guess I’ve learnt my lesson it was easy to see My old lady she played this joke on me I never looked where I forgot it would be there Love for sale, love for sale Love for sale Love for sale Love for sale Bon Jovi — 1 — Penthouse — 2 — Sears (Sears, Roebuck and Company, Sears Holdings) — /C Bon Jovi — Love For Sale